Family crises are common, but not all families have the resources and support to deal with these situations.
Parents who don’t have relatives or babysitters to care for their children when a crisis arises are sometimes forced to use child protective services or foster care, which can lead to scrutiny and trauma, says Sarah Ellefson, interim director of STAR House, a new crisis shelter in St. Paul.
A crisis shelter is different, she said: It’s a home away from home.
“The old expression is, ‘It takes a village to raise a child,’” Ellefson said Tuesday. “But here it is: ‘It takes a village to support a parent.’”
STAR House is a free crisis child care center that prioritizes the safety and well-being of children up to 6 years old. For parents and guardians in crisis, STAR House provides their children with a safe place to stay under the supervision of trained staff and volunteers, Friday through Sunday.
“We want to be a resource for families to help prevent this crisis from turning into a catastrophe,” said Sarah Anderson, president of STAR House.
How it works
The STAR in their name represents strength, time and resilience: “The strength it takes to ask for help, the time we provide and hopefully that leads to resilience for the family,” Ellefson said.
What qualifies as a crisis is determined by the family, she said.
No crisis is too big or too small and socio-economic status plays no role in deciding who qualifies for care. Their system operates on a first-come, first-served basis, serving five children at a time. Appointments can be requested after 8 a.m. on Thursdays by calling and leaving a voicemail at 651-356-8678 or at starhousemn.org/contact-us.
“If there’s something going on, we’d much rather they bring the kids here and they’re safe,” Ellefson said.
The nursery, located in an undisclosed (for safety reasons) St. Paul neighborhood, is decorated inside with rainbow-colored rugs, rocket ship-shaped lamps and stuffed animals. Ellefson said she designed the house with comfort in mind.
“Sometimes in the service industry it can be, ‘Hey, it’s good enough,’” Ellefson said. “We wanted it to be excellent and we want to keep it that way.”
As soon as children enter the home, they are reassured by staff that the reason they are there is because their family loves them and wants them to be well cared for. Ellefson said she doesn’t want children to feel like they are being taken away from their families.
“Every topic I teach is laced with, ‘We do this for the dignity and respect of families,’” Ellefson said.
The house is somewhat child-run, Ellefson said. Kids can hang out on the couch and watch movies or have dance parties, and if a child needs to cry, it’s not a problem because the house can support them while they cry.
“So far everyone is really excited to be here, literally running through the door,” Ellefson said.
Much need
During their first referral-only weekend on Nov. 1, the house was full, which Anderson said reflects the need in Ramsey County.
According to a 2020 study by the Wilder Foundation, Ramsey County has 19% of Minnesota’s homeless population. According to the foundation’s 2023 survey, four in 10 people experiencing homelessness in the state are children or youth under the age of 24.
“It’s a huge number and a heartbreaking number,” Anderson said.
Homelessness is just one type of crisis that STAR House can help address. Others may be related to mental health, domestic violence and more.
The daycare center partners with organizations to provide resources to parents and guardians as needed. On Sundays, each family also receives bags of food to take with them.
“We want to be a resource for families to prevent the crisis from turning into a catastrophe, strengthen the family and reduce the short- and long-term trauma for everyone involved,” Anderson said.
Natalie Simonet, Ramsey County Emergency Communications Community Coordinator, works closely with domestic violence cases. Simonet said that given the high volume of crisis calls her department receives, parents are often looking for overnight shelter for their children.
“I’m so glad this resource is available,” Simonet said. “Working in 911, we unfortunately see the need for a safe space like this at all hours of the day.”
Personal experience
Ellefson has worked at the Greater Minneapolis Crisis Nursery and other child care organizations and has experience in this field. However, opening STAR House has been a dream since early adulthood.
Raised in St. Paul by a single mother who lived in poverty, Ellefson said she got into a lot of trouble as a child. At one point, she and her sister were placed in foster care. Due to her childhood, she said she always cared deeply about children.
“I think STAR House is really unique in many ways,” Ellefson said. “We do our utmost to be culturally responsive and trauma-informed.”
Ellefson didn’t have the option of crisis care when she was young, something she said could have helped all the children she grew up with.
“We want it to be a community place,” Ellefson said.
Because the need is great, Ellefson hopes to expand in the future, increase capacity and offer families more residential days. For now, she said, it’s one day at a time.
“We are like a childcare center, but our mission is to support families through their children,” Ellefson said.
