Naomi Osaka says she feels “scared” after returning to tennis after maternity leave and feeling like she wasn’t in her own body.
Osaka, a former world No. 1, returned to tennis in January after her daughter Shai was born in July 2023. But she has struggled to advance beyond the third round of a Grand Slam tournament so far.
The Japanese said her problem was not the recent loss to Ashlyn Krueger in qualifying for the Cincinnati Open, but a broader “strange” feeling that her body was not behaving as it should, which made her scream internally.
“My biggest issue right now is not the loss, but that I don’t feel like I’m in my body,” Osaka, 26, said on Instagram.
“It’s a strange feeling, missing shots that I shouldn’t miss, hitting shots softer than I remember. I try to tell myself, ‘It’s okay, you’re doing great. Just get through this and keep pushing.’ Mentally, it really wears me down.
“Don’t get me wrong, I’ve played a handful of games this year where I felt like I was myself and I know this moment is probably just a small phase of all the new transitions [clay, grass, clay, hard]“But the only feeling I can compare now is the feeling I have after giving birth,” she said.
“I find that scary, because I’ve been playing tennis since I was three. The racket has to feel like an extension of my hand.”
Osaka elaborates on this dislocated feeling, concluding with a promise to “work as hard as I can.” [she] can and give it [her] best shot”, both for herself and for her daughter.
The admission is particularly poignant in the wake of the Paris Olympics, which saw more mothers than ever before take part – nine from Team GB – and showed the world that motherhood and elite sport can go hand in hand.
While Osaka is back playing tennis and cited a “handful” of matches in which she felt like herself again since giving birth, her post suggests there may still be work to be done in acknowledging the difficulties that come with returning to elite sport after giving birth.
Osaka has at least opened up the conversation more broadly, with many women in the comments thanking her for sharing her story. One of them is fellow professional tennis player Caroline Garcia, who Osaka recently hosted on her podcast Tennis Insider Club, where she spoke openly about tennis and motherhood.
At the end of the statement, Osaka assures that she will be in New York for the US Open, which starts on August 26, and that the women’s singles final is scheduled for September 7.
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